I would not wish this anguish on a single living soul …
I woke this morning to a series of flashbacks. These are uncommon but, when they do come, they bring me to my knees.
Memories of my illness swarmed my mind. Memories of the person that illness turned me into. Of unwanted hospital stays and rounds of shock therapy. Of years questioning my value as a wife, a mother. The fear I was never and could never be the woman my husband and children needed me to be.
I rose from the bed, walked to the window for a look, and came to this conclusion:
That single self-destructive thought sounded off like an alarm. It and it alone could be heard.
I ran—and I do mean ran—got my meds, took them so fast it would make your head spin … it certainly did mine (lol).
Then, with not a moment in between, I completely emersed myself in prayer. Prayer so deep, I became lost in it.
That was the only answer.
After leaning on my God for what seemed like half the day, relief came across my horizon.
Get this. The topic was overcoming challenges!
And, if my experiences weren’t enough, couple it with the fact that I’m never at a loss for words and you’ve got a heaven-made match. For me, semantics are easier than my ABCs!
Well, if you haven’t guessed already, I was one of the forty chosen.
As I search for God’s will on this devotion, I clearly cannot take credit for any of this.
Oh no! All the glory is His!
Dr. Barrier has remarked several times that he just doesn’t understand how I get along (join the club, Doc).
But see, I get God. And He gets me. It is God who takes me through my dark hours and God who provides the sunlight.
God gives me love through my family and friends.
It’s not so much that I’ve overcome the challenges … No, they’re still here. But through them (and often because of them), I have grown to love God more and more with each passing day.
Until next time …